I wanted to thank everyone for their comments and support, it's helped a lot to have so many people understand the grief we feel.
It's hard to know what to do next - looking at the blog I don't know what to do. This really was about telling the story of my boys, and their adventures. I guess the next step is to take Inigo's name off. I may wait a while to do that.
It's started to really sink in for Rumbles that his brother isn't coming home. He greets me at the door every day and looks past me, as if to say 'where is he?' We've got the Feliway running for him, and we're giving him lots of cuddles.
Thank you all again.